Sunday 8 December 2013

On Writing Confidence



Writing a story and getting it out in the world requires confidence. A lot of writers – if not every – sometimes have moments were they lack that confidence. You think your writing absolutely sucks and that no one will ever want to read your book. Moments like that are very humbling and every writer should have them every now and then, even the very best. Being overly confident will make you arrogant but having no confidence at all will lead you nowhere. 

I am not a very confident person. I doubt a lot and I know how unhappy that can make me. My inner critic is a fierce monster that I haven’t been able to tame. The fear of not being good enough and the bouts of ‘my writing sucks’ can be severe enough to ruin my day. Sometimes I even question why I am putting so much effort in it. Why would I make myself feel horrible by trying over and over again? There are times that I have no answer for this and when it is really very bad (which luckily doesn’t occur that often) I might even end up curling in my bed and cry. I am never going to be able to make my dream come through, is what spooks through my mind then. There is no one around to cheer me up and tell me my writing isn’t as horrible as I think. The only ones who can get me out of this writing slump are the characters. They refuse to leave me alone and demand that I spend time with them and continue telling their story. I love them for that, though they aren’t always very convincing. 

But if I stop writing, what else will I do? I am only as passionate about reading but that does not offer me the creative outlet that I need. I cannot make anything of my own with only reading. I need to pick up those words and group them into sentences that eventually become a story. The prospect that I have to severely cut back on writing time very soon because of upcoming exams makes me sad. And this proves me that I meant to write. 

One time you might feel like we can write as good as or even better than, our favourite authors. Yet some time later, you might feel like your writing is worthless crap. It is far harder to get out of that, but remember why you are writing and think about what you would do if you weren’t writing. If you like the possible substitute of writing more, you might want to consider if you are truly passionate about telling a story with words. Without passion, you will get through the hard days and the less fun aspects of writing.

Hold on to the magic of writing and never give up. The journey is very difficult and perhaps dangerous for your sanity, but I heard the rewards make it all worth it. 



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